Music Videos That Suck

Butthead: Uh…what is this?
Beavis: Heh heh. It’s a video game! Heh heh. I think. Heh hm heh.
Butthead: Woah. These graphics suck!
Beavis: Yeah, really. Heh heh. The music too! It sucks! Heh heh hm heh.
…

Butthead: The name’s Bung. James Bung. Huh huh.
Beavis: Yeah! Heh heh. I’ll have a choad cola…shaken not stirred! Heh
heh heh.
Butthead: Huh huh huh. Where are the Bung girls? Huh huh.
Beavis: Yeah! Heh heh. Where’s Octopussy! Heh heh. I wanna see Octopussy! Octopussy! Octopussy! Heh heh heh.
Butthead: Huh huh huh huh huh.

A must-see for any Indiana Jones fan. Thanks to my friend Clare for sending in this one.

It was 18 years ago today that Stevie Ray Vaughan’s helicopter banked into a mountain, stealing from us one of music’s greatest geniuses. I remember exactly where I was when I heard the news: In Service Merchandise, buying a calculator for my high school calculus class. I didn’t know who Stevie Ray Vaughan was (I think at the time I thought he was a football player) but these many years later, I got hip to who he was, and realized what we lost.

It’s been said that Stevie Ray never played one original lick, but I don’t care. Anyway, he wore his influences on his sleeve, proudly. Every note he played was a tribute to a bluesman who came before him. You probably don’t need me to tell you this, but Stevie Ray could PLAY. I can do some half-assed mimicry of guitar gods like Eddie Van Halen, Angus Young and Jimi Hendrix. But Stevie Ray’s stuff is so out there, it’s in a class by itself. I can’t even make his most basic riffs sound authentic. He was just one of a kind. One of my favorite stories about him involves a meeting he had with Eric Clapton. They’re in the studio and SRV is jamming away. Clapton is awestruck. He picks up guitar, plays a few notes, then puts his guitar down and WALKS OUT. SRV is so out there, even Clapton couldn’t keep up with the man.

I’m especially in love with SRV’s instrumental version of Hendrix’s Little Wing. I don’t often say I prefer a cover to the original, but this is definitely one of those times. I heard he did this one in one take. That’s 7 minutes of uninterrupted genius.

I have mixed feelings about the video. I like it for the most part, as it appropriately pays tribute to Stevie Ray and his influences. But it is also a commercial for Fender guitars. I can’t get too upset about it though, because the video captures the pleasure that people get from guitars - both playing and listening - and anyway, Stevie Ray himself was a big fan of guitars. He probably would have approved.

Thank God for the Upper Crust. If you’ve been following this blog for long, you know of my weakness for pure, balls-out rock and roll. You may also know I’m a sucker for bands with a sense of humor. The Upper Crust is both. I’ve heard their schtick described as the worst rock idea ever: Rocking out as Victorian aristocrats, with pancake makeup, powdered wigs and the whole 9 yards. Yes, it’s the worst idea ever, in the best way possible. For one, these fashions haven’t been cool since they were actually in fashion. Secondly, rock and roll is about being pissed off. The only thing I could see these guys being pissed off about is that in their day syphilis wasn’t yet curable. They find a way to be pissed off nevertheless, reveling in their privilege and sense of entitlement.

But don’t dismiss the Upper Crust as a joke band. They are legitimately GOOD! In fact, they’re my favorite AC/DC tribute act ever. I’ve seen em twice live, and they kicked fucking ass both times.

My friend Vince introduced me to this band, and it’s been a love affair ever since. (With the band, not with Vince. I love ya buddy, just not in that way. Thanks for cluing me into this band though.)

It’s been quite a while since I got my Indian on, so I figure it’s high time for some more prime Bollywood weirdness. Who knew India was so darn funky?

Thanks to 5 Minutes to Live for making this clip available. He’s got lots of cool videos, I stole the Metal Pizza clip from him, too.

I don’t know exactly what it is about Tiny Tim that creeps me the hell out. I think it’s because he’s the size of a linebacker with a falsetto higher than Judy Tenuta’s. Also he looks pissed off when he sings this song. I always kinda thought he looked like the lost cast member from the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Here’s a band after my own heart - Loud, kick-ass rock n roll, delivered by the kind of bad girls you once wished would corrupt your prepubescent horny self. (All right, I’m speaking for myself here, but so what. I can’t be the only one.)

A friend of mine is fond of saying he liked the Donnas better when they were called the Runaways. I say fuck that. I don’t care if it was done before. Someone is making rock and roll today, and that’s refreshing in a day where every band has a turntable and/or a wardrobe purchased entirely at Hot Topic or the local thrift store. That’s not to say the Donnas aren’t hip. They just appear not to give a shit.

The animated video plus the hard rock attitude reminds me of the excellent Resurrection by Peter Pan Speedrock.

This one hurts: Julius Carry III has passed away at the age of 56. If you don’t know who Julius Carry III is, maybe you know his alter ego, the Shogun of Harlem, aka Sho’Nuff. If you don’t know who Sho’Nuff is, what the fuck, have you been living under a rock? Sho’Nuff is one of the great camp movie villains of all time, and really the only reason to watch The Last Dragon. The movie would’ve been a piece of shit without him. And the world is a bit of a sadder place that he’s gone. Fortunately, he left us a handful of great cinematic moments to remember him by.